As much as it KILLS me to admit it, Kim Kardashian said something brilliant the other day:
“There is this generation of young people – girls – who are beautiful but don’t have a strong work ethic,” said Kim…
“People sometimes think that with looks things will be easy, but I just encourage people to put in the work.” <===I always encourage people to consistently seek wisdom from the best possible sources, but wisdom can come from anywhere…
There’s a MYTH in our culture that “success” happens overnight and that people who are successful had advantages or “just got lucky.”
Let’s examine that myth for a second. Is it true?
IMAGINE TWO VERSIONS OF YOURSELF:
One is a trust fund baby. You’ve had “everything” handed to you your whole life. The problem is, you’re lazy and unwilling to put in the consistent work and take the consistent ACTIONS necessary to actually live a fulfilled, satisfying, successful life.
The other version of you is you right now, exactly where you are and from your exact background. This version of yourself has a clear VISION for your life and an ideal-self image you are working toward.
The best thing about this version of yourself is that you KEEP TAKING MASSIVE ACTION and putting in the work to get just a LITTLE BIT BETTER every day (while accepting yourself completely as you are now, of course…).
Who has the better life?
We all START OFF at different places, with more or less obstacles to our dream life than everyone else.
But at the end of the day, over time, where you END UP is a result of your vision for your life, your self-image, your support system, and MOST IMPORTANTLY, taking action consistently.
I’m willing to bet Britney Spears STILL works harder than you even though she “made it” as a teenager. <===Ponder this for a bit and do some research before you disagree…
There is no other way to live a fulfilled, successful life than continuous improvement (kaizen).
We are wired for growth.
The feeling that we are “moving forward” and “making progress” in our life is very important to our long-term happiness (along with expressing gratitude). Expressing gratitude, healthy growth toward your vision, and letting your self-image evolve is the lifestyle we want to live.
So start where you are, take massive action, and improve a little bit every day. If you do, you’ll love the RESULTS.
There are no shortcuts.
Lets talk about “luck” for a second.
What happens to lottery jackpot winners?
I mean the ones who win HUGE sums of money up to hundreds of millions of dollars…
Research shows that after a few months, they GO BACK TO THEIR NORMAL HAPPINESS LEVELS…(Check out this amazing TED Talk called “The Surprising Science of Happiness” by Dan Gilbert for more if you haven’t seen it already).
Many lose the money they won because they haven’t built up money management skills over time and because they don’t have a support system in place to help them “keep” the money.
How about Vegas?
The casinos make their money when you “WIN.”
For example:
If you’re playing craps and the dice come up on a particular number that you bet on, and the odds of hitting that number are 11-1, the house will pay you LESS than those odds when you hit it…
In this case, they might pay you $10 for a $1 bet, for example, when they SHOULD be paying you $11 to cover the actual odds. That $1 margin is where much of the casino’s profit comes from. However, most of us still feel really good when they pay us the $10…
Casinos don’t try to get lucky. <===Let that roll around for a minute…
Would you rather be the person who gets lucky one night and wins $10,000 at the craps table, or would you rather be the person who gets good results consistently over time?
Trying to get lucky and having a luck/overnight success mentality also shows no respect for the seasons in life.
You are never a “success” or a “failure.”
Donald Trump has been millions of dollars in DEBT.
Celebrities who seem to “have it all” get divorces like they’re going out of style.
People like Bernie Madoff who try to take a shortcut by scamming people GO TO JAIL.
So, like Kim Kardashian says, NO MATTER WHERE YOU ARE NOW, or what gifts you happen to have (good looks, money, fame, etc.) you sill have to put in the work.
There is no other way if you want to be fulfilled AND successful.
So I encourage you not to worry about GETTING LUCKY.
Take massive action and keep growing every day instead.
LET YOUR SELF-IMAGE EVOLVE AND CATCH UP
When you keep doing the work every day, failing, learning, and growing, your self-image also grows at the same time. The fact that your identity is changing will allow your gains to become PERMANENT. That’s what we want.
We want this to be about who you’re becoming; at the end of the day all that matters is who you are.
MAKE YOUR OWN LUCK
Make sure your expectations are reasonable for what you’re trying to do.
Remember that success at most worthwhile endeavors takes time.
Also, for every 10 opportunities you pursue, 1 will tend to work out.<===This is a good rule of thumb to remember (for some things, 1/20 or even 1/100 is a realistic rate of success, and others are more likely to work out. Adjust this rule for what you’re doing, but if you don’t have data, assume only 1 out of 10 things you try will work).
Edison made 1,000 unsuccessful attempts at inventing the modern light bulb before he found the winner (and he EXPECTED a high “failure” rate).
Take the pressure of succeeding the first time off of yourself.
To get what you want you have to EXPECT to fail more and get “rejected” more and be okay with it.
It’s cool.
You’re still awesome anyway. =)
You are a badass right now regardless of any outcomes happening for you or not. You are ALREADY a badass before you “succeed” and once you are successful, you aren’t any more badass…it’s just another confirmation.
You are a badass because of the person you are in this moment and because of the ACTIONS you take in the direction of your ideal life.
“You will either step forward into growth, or you will step back into safety.” -Abraham Maslow
Last thing for this post…
HIGH ACHIEVEMENT
There’s a book I highly recommend about human potential and achievement that I think is worth your time.
It’s called The Genius in All of Us by David Shenk.
There’s a ton of good info in the book, and if you’re a fan of Outliers, you’ll love it even more.
One of the most important things David Shenk talks about in the book is that high performers in every human endeavor (from violinists to athletes to artists to entrepreneurs…) had one important thing in common:
DELIBERATE PRACTICE
Deliberate practice means that when you spend time working on something you want to be good at, you don’t just reinforce where you are currently.
Instead, you stretch yourself a little bit BEYOND where you are now ON PURPOSE every time you practice.
That’s what Kim Kardashian is talking about.
Michael Jordan loved to practice and treated it with the same respect as a game.
Tiger Woods kept working on and changing his swing AFTER he already “made it.”
Lady Gaga played up to 4 live concerts a day for months AFTER her hit album “The Fame” had already come out. It only moved up the charts after this monumental effort.
By the end of his career, Picasso was producing around 3 pieces of art EVERY SINGLE DAY, against the advice of his business partners (they thought it would diminish the value of his works…I guess we know who was right…).
Top performers all know this.
It’s not luck or magic that will get you to the top.
Where you start matters, but much less than we think.
Deliberate daily practice is the biggest key along with getting the best coaching and mentoring you can find.
You may not have much right now. You may not have access to the best coaches at the moment.
But, you DO have the most important ingredient for success:
The ability to take action, put in the work, and improve just a little bit every day at the things you care about most.
Keep taking action toward your vision and ideal self-image.
If you express gratitude and keep improving every day (KAIZEN), you’ll get there and be happy along the way, BUT, as the great philosopher Britney Spears has said so eloquently:
“You better work b*tch…”
If two of America’s “classiest” females who happened to start out with a lot and could have “coasted” get this, what’s stopping you? 😉
Cheers to Your Massive Success AND Fulfillment,
Jim
